Have you been around a dying child?

Let's talk about the deaths of our children even when it feel difficult.
Even when we choke up with tears every time we think about them.
Even when the loss is still present.
After so many years.

I am available as an inspirational speaker about all aspects of death including the luminous side of dying for both US and international events. Click here to find out more about my talks and click here to contact me.

We feel a first movement, the tiniest flutter, easily not noticed at first. Then our bellies grow round, and rounder, and rounder.

We give birth to these miraculous little beings. We look into their eyes and fall into a feeling so large, so vast...

Some of them leave us. Very soon or many years later.

It hurts no matter how many years they are with us.

It hurts. To have had a dying child.

It hurts.

Baby Miscarriage

Maybe we hardly knew that one had arrived inside of us. Maybe we had seen the test and were so ready. So ready.

And then the bleeding starts. A baby miscarriage.

Some of us would sigh in relief. Some of us would cry in sorrow. Some of us would feel despair.

Over a dying child. Over a little one that left us. So little. So soon.

Stillborn Babies

We feel the babies growing inside of us. We watch the mother's bodies changing. We get the house, the room, the closets, the crib ready. We are feeling excited, in anticipation of this new life in our lives.

Something somewhere goes wrong and there is a dying child. Inside our belly.

We go through the hard work of labor. We give birth... We have to give birth... The child is stillborn.

All the energy invested in making room ready for a new arrival for nothing.

All that time spent preparing for nothing.

All that work for nothing.

All that is left is the hurting empty place in our hearts.

But there is a body. Our baby's body. Out of the womb.

As if it wants to be seen. As if it wants to be held. As if it wants to be touched, given one final caress.

Can we allow ourselves to feel touched back by the presence of this dead child's body? Can we just be with it for a short time. A few minutes. Half an hour. Just be with it.

And then let it go. So soon.

So often our stillborn babies' bodies look quite perfect and beautiful. Even our handicapped babies look beautiful. More beautiful than if left to our imagination.

If we don't allow ourselves that special time to connect, there is a chance of regret sneaking in later. And it is so hard to let go of regret. There is nothing we can do about a missed chance like that - later.

Premature Babies

We give birth to these tiny little beings. So precious. So fragile. So perfect. Already.

Often confined to the square world of their incubators. All these wires, hoses and lines connected to them. So hard to hold them close.

If only we could take them home.

Some of them don't stay with us for very long.

They leave us for various medical reasons. They leave us for reasons of their own. For reasons we hardly ever understand.

They were with us so short. A few days. A few weeks. Maybe a month or two. Then a dying child.

And then they are gone from us.

And we are hurting. And go on hurting for quite a while.

- Craig Cardiff -

Click here to hear this song on Craig's Facebook Music Player

Young Children

All we know is they are gone.

Others keep growing. And growing. They do what children do. They start crawling. They start walking. They say their first words.

And always these great smiles. The bright eyes. The easy laughter.

They start kindergarten. They start school. They start Little League. They learn how to swim. They learn how to ride their bikes. They play with dolls. They play with cars. They make friends. They lose friends.

They get sick. They get well again.

They grow up as most children do.

Some leave us again. For so many reasons. There is never a right reason for a dying child. For the death of a child.

Some go very quickly. An accident. And they are gone from us. Just like that.

Some take their time to leave. Develop cancer or some other life threatening disease. Courageously they go through chemo or radiation. Some get better and start over with a child's life. Get back on track living. Wiser for their years.

Some get these clear big open eyes. We know, against all hope, that they are on their way out. That this precious child is leaving us. Soon. A dying child.

They are gone.

And it almost never makes any sense. Why would they take all that time to come to us? why would they take all that time to grow up and then leave?

It does not make any sense.

And it hurts. A lot.

Teenagers

Their voices change. And change again. Their hair styles change. And change again. Their clothing styles change. And change again. Their dreams change. And change again.

They are reaching into adulthood while holding onto childhood. They delight us in their early wisdom. They aggravate us in their easy alliance with the shadow.

And again we lose some.

We lose them to car accidents. Once they can drive. We lose them to drunk driving. Even if they are not allowed to drink. We lose them to suicide. When they feel that they just don't fit in. That nobody loves or understands them well enough to stay around.

In some areas we lose them to violent crimes. To crazy dares. To stupid games. Bright flames burning out quickly.

We lose them to a variety of deadly diseases. While their bodies are being sick, they grow up so quickly. Become wise way beyond their years. As if to live a lot of life in a short time. The bright flame of dying child.

One day or one night they are gone. Have died. Only memories and pictures left. Dead.

And it still hurts. Often for a long time.

A Different Perspective

I have looked into the eyes metaphorically ... of those who are about to come to Earth for three months, knowing full well the potential that they would die as a child...

Why would they do that?

The death of a child sometimes changes a family forever. Absolutely forever.

Sometimes it is so debilitating, it takes them to zero. It beats up their emotions to zero. It makes them grovel on the floor and cry out to God.

Sometimes in anger. Sometimes in desperation. Always in sorrow.

And that's where they find the higher self. That's where they start a whole new life. And that is where they create light that wasn't there before.

And for the rest of their lives, they change the very dirt in the earth that they walk on.

Because they found spirit.

All because a human being said “I'll do it. I'll come in and do that. I'll do that.”

The parents don't realize that so often they come right back in, if the parents will allow it, as another child. Same soul. They show up and say “I'm back”. Parents don't see that.

From: Lee Carroll as Kryon in “The Great Split” Melbourne, Australia March 14, 2010. Here is the a link to the MP3 version of the full channeling.

Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep

The soft, gentle heirloom photographs of these beautiful babies are an important part of the healing process. They invite us to honor and cherish our dying child, and to share the spirits of their lives, even though short.

Click here to check out the website Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep